negative emotions and the law of attraction...simple stuff

My friend and I did this experiment to try to work out the best way to deal with negative emotions. 

We were discussing how our patterning had taught us to be independent and responsible and to stand on our own two feet and how this often translated into hiding our emotions and an inability to reach out for the support of others in times of need. We thought that, in the spirit of community (which we both assign more value to of late), we would give a try to reaching out to the other one when negative feelings arise, with the intention not of wallowing in sorrow or self-pity, but to deliberately try to assist in pivoting the other's mood around with greater efficiency than we can normally achieve in a solo effort.

The experiment didn't last long for me. The following day I found myself stepping through the awkward barrier of the "textual cry for help", sending a message proclaiming that I felt lonely and premenstrual (HA.) The response I received told me everything I needed to know about how flawed our hypothesis is. It showed me again the infallible and all-pervasive Law of Attraction, which never ever goes awry!

The response?

"at work. i think ur awesome."

Oh the precision and beauty of such a disappointing moment! The vibration of lonely cannot be met with any other vibration than that which it emits.....loneliness begets more loneliness.

I processed the situation via a nap and when I woke up I wrote...

"I keep learning this one. Maybe if I write it I will remember now. Something uncomfortable comes and you want to reach out for its opposite but it is an invitation. Take it, lean in. It is an invitation to go deeper. There is something there just beyond the strain of the discomfort. Look at it, don't look away. 

You are lonely and you want to fill that void with other people, go out, get busy, be seen and touch someone. But don't do it, don't touch a soul. Go into the loneliness. Be and breathe the loneliness. It is speaking a sacred lesson to you. You are right here inside. The loneliness is not a 'thing' but a guard that the ego presents to protect reality as it is currently perceived. But what is beyond that veil there is no question, there is only a deep knowing, a jarring awake. 

So always move in when you are invited by the pain. Go inside it. There is some great gift in there. A becoming.

Never fear.

Faith is the most important muscle you can exercise.

You will emerge.

You will be revealed to you. This is so important."

Healing Body Image and Damaging Beliefs with Intentional Touch

Do you know someone who can benefit from the healing power of intentional touch?

Chances are, you or someone you know has at some time experienced issues with body image, self-esteem, self-worth, depression, anxiety, or negative thinking. These experiences are a natural part of being human, and ideally we move through them gracefully or not gracefully into spaces of deeper self-understanding, self-acceptance, and humility. That is, through the pain of knowing how not to love ourselves or to push this love away, we come to a more radical unconditional self-love.

Through my observations of myself and of the people close to me in my life, I have noticed that self-esteem and self-worth issues can be triggered from long-standing beliefs and patterns of behaviour - relationships that were uncaring or abusive, careless words said by others or ourselves, unloving thoughts. 

Often times, unconscious touch, given and received, can have negative consequences for body image. Imagine in your relationships if you felt that the touch of your significant other was always hyper-sexualised, for example. Or if, in the past, people only touched you if they wanted something from you (sex, affection, approval, agreement). If these are the patterns you've experienced, touch can be loaded with so much baggage, stories, and judgement. 

My theory is that if we can heal the intention of touch, we can heal the effect on the receiver (and the giver, actually!). This is the work I am doing with my Hawaiian massage practice. Through meditation and connection to source, I purify my intention throughout the treatment session, asking that any unwanted thoughts and judgements be removed, and that my intention and actions be for the highest benefit of the client.

The feedback I have received has supported this theory. Even though I've not explained the energetic intention of the treatment in most cases to the client, frequently they will say to me that they felt accepted, nurtured, and even beautiful! Several times, I've had clients express to me that for some time during their massage, all worries about their body, and self-judgements completely cleared and they felt that everything is exactly how it should be.

This feedback is so inspiring for me. It affirms that what I know to be true can be shared with others through the power of intentioned touch. 

My intention with this work is to share with anyone who can benefit from the clearing of negative body image or negative associations with touch. I see this in particular as being relevant to women who have been in hyper-sexualised or abusive relationships. 

I want everyone to know that they are worthy, exactly as they are in their current body. Everyone deserves to love and be loved. Everyone deserves to be touched in a pure and loving way.

In order to make this potential for healing accessible to EVERYONE, I offer sliding scale prices on my treatments. I would also like to announce that each month I will offer one or two treatments gratis (without charge) to those who can't afford to pay the fee. If you would like to nominate someone you know to receive one of these treatments with me, please email me with a couple of sentences on why you think this person would benefit from this experience and the reason that you believe they might be experiencing financial hardship. Of course, you may also nominate yourself.

You can get in touch via the Contact page of my website http://www.heartinhand.com.au/contact/ 
or email rikki@heartinhand.com.au 

I know that sometimes the hardest thing to do is to reach out and make contact. I hope you will have the courage to follow up if this is something that your heart is telling you to do.

Much love,
Rikki

photo credit: http://www.aprilwerz.com/ 

free

i don't WANT freedom i am FREE.

i look around and see that i never was trapped. the chains were an illusion.

the lie is this apparent structure of the world. the truth is in my body, in my heartbeat.

2015: year of the mermaid

2015 is the year of the mermaid. I know that because I just decided so right now. It is my (belated) new year's resolution, before I become a woodland faerie next year (stay tuned for explanation).

The mermaid is gorgeous and wild. ruled by great mother ocean and aligned with the water element, mermaid seeks fluidity, harmony, and depth. 

Her emotions are her power. She hides not from pain and suffering, nor does she wane in the warm glow of ecstasy. She allows her experiences, internal and external, to wash over her like a wave - sweeping, all-encompassing, and then gone, silent and still.

Mermaid is a nomad and an creature-lover. Always exploring, adventuring, and meeting magical animal and plant friends along the way. She is totally present in the moment, not rushing to the next adventure before exploring the current one entirely, trying different angles and viewpoints to see from where she can get the best view (the best view to her is always the one that makes her heart sing with beauty!).

Drawn ever-seaward, mermaid is pulled here and there like the tide by the moon. To her, the ocean is freedom, purification, home. not grounded with feet on the earth, like the woodland faerie (whose year is 2016), the mermaid's centre is in her heart and speech.

Sound is her sensual pleasure, and it must be communicated from the wisdom of the heart. To close up, to hold back, is to deny life to the mermaid, who leads with her heart. she loves to sing, to create sound and rhythm, and to feel her body move with this sacred dance.

Mermaid is kind, sensitive, attentive, and a good listener. her intuition leads her to the best way to care for people, animals, and plant-friends. and care she must! Her empathy is as deep and as wide as the sea.

Mermaid's weakness is loneliness, brought about by long bouts away from home. She is non-dualistic, seeing other beings not only as her brother, but as another image of her self. She dissolves borders and membranes which appear to create separation. She is an expert at merging all of life. separation, or threats of separation, can feel wrenching for her, a threat to the unity and oneness she seeks. But mermaid, don't cry, remember relationships are eternal and separation is only illusion. There is a time for proximity and a time for space, just as the wave flows and ebbs.

Everything mermaid does is infused with a playful and light-hearted joy. Her work is done efficiently, but is often a means to an end, a mere formality so she can quickly return to the realms of play.

Her relationships are lightly-bound and forgiving. Laughter fills the space around her. 

Mermaid, this is your year. 

Be as gorgeous and boundless as you dare! 

Seek only joy within the glorious revelation of each moment! 

Swim, romp, and sing! 

Connect passionately and meaningfully, and let go with grace and ease. 

Let your hair be wild. 

Rx

what does yoga look like?

I often find myself reminding students “yoga isn’t about what you do or what the pose looks like, it’s about how you are in the pose, your state of mind and whether you are breathing. It's not WHAT you do, it's HOW you do it!”
  
Yet I find that, as someone who subscribes to a number of yoga-related media and who has many friends in the yoga community, I am constantly inundated with beautiful – utterly perfect – photos of someone or another effortlessly nailing an advanced posture. Numerous photos per day flood my ‘walls’ and ‘feeds’ alerting me simultaneously to both the stunning nature of this physical practice, as well as my decidedly inadequate status as a non-perfect, lumpy, and short-hamstringed individual.  

What gives? Are the only people out there in yoga-land made of rubber bands? Do they actually roll out of bed looking stunning before sunrise and get to the beach warmed up and ready to strike the pose just as a pod of pink dolphins begin to frolic in the background? 

What does yoga really look like?  

Your yoga. My yoga.  

The yoga that awaits me as I drag myself, half awake, to the mat each morning, with matted hair, and daggy gym shorts. The yoga that yawns my joints into motion through creaks and cracks. The yoga that still challenges me to accept where I am and not to ask for the moment to be anything more than what it is – perfect imperfection. 

The power of our practice is not always something that everyone can see through an instagram filter. 

More often, it is a slow and silent intimacy – that moment when the mind, the soul, and the body connect. Aha! HERE I am.

Here is my yoga tonight, in pictures – the fidgets, the fumbles, the falls, and the freedom. 

I want to see your yoga and share to inspire others. Do you dare to have your photo here? 

Does the so-called "yogic journey" necessitate an instagram account? a hashtag? a facebook page?

As i practice into the body of my yoga, does it need to be on display to be loved, to be true, and to be worthwhile? Why do I struggle with my ego each time I see a handstand photo online?

(How can I even write this? So many people who i love finding art in their asana. Do i betray them?)

Do i betray myself if i never shine as bright as them? If I never achieve asana-greatness will I never be a yogi? Am I not trying hard enough?

What does it mean to be a yogi?

Do I need to have long legs, supple hamstrings, and colourful eco-friendly tights?

Is that one rung on the ladder to G-d's golden treehouse? 

If I become a yogic body will i come closer to a yogic mind?

I can't find G-d in that.

But then these days I don't even want to try. I just want to practice being this.

This. Being.

How can I love it more?

I ask. I feel. I navigate emotions like captain ahab. From a pile of bones sitting on a floor. The rising and falling of waves.

I am the white whale.

This isn't even a yogic journey. Because, really, "yogic" doesn't mean anything. It's just a word. It's just the way I'm expressing coming back to myself. But it's nothing really. It's so simple, it's not even good or bad. It's just becoming more right where i am. 

I think on that journey everything becomes more and more like love. Each moment is of utmost importance. In each encounter i meet a soulmate. 

The journey is so vast it includes all of life, yet so simple it becomes narrowed to one task. The practice of peace. 

Asana robs me of peace when it stirs my ego. Asana draws me into peace when it shows me the ever-changing nature of feeling, breath, circumstances. 

When I practice with the intention of peace, Asana is just another way I love myself.

coming inside

you beg and you beg and once you are finally granted access to the whole world, you find that the very best part was the part you had access to all along.

you start as a baby. you can't move but to cry and flail. you are confined to your own little body. 

as you grow bigger and more capable, your world expands.

now the perimeter of your crib. now the soft blanket where your mother places you and you begin to crawl. now the coffee table where you prop yourself up for the first time.

the whole room. the whole house. and finally you go outside and play. you walk to school by yourself. you get older and you borrow your mother's car. 

you are free. you fly away to the other side of the world. you go where your impulses take you.

you try everything.

you taste foods, drugs, flesh. you send your mind through the expanse of books, of knowledge and learning.

you go where your imagination will allow you.

then you sit. alone. in a room.

you become very still and quiet. 

you wait for that treasured glimpse of the whole universe inside you.